The only chance we have as a country right now is for Osama bin Laden to deploy and detonate a major weapon in the United States. … It’s an absurd situation again, only Osama can execute an attack which will force Americans to demand that their government protect them effectively, consistently, and with as much violence as necessary.
Former CIA official Michael Scheuer on the Glenn Beck Program. Link via TAPPED.
I am loath to disagree with the reasonable Michael Scheuer, but Osama bin Laden is fortunately not our only hope for a better America. Osama, like many foreign workers, may be cheaper than our own labor supply, but in the debate between free-markets and protecting American jobs I must respectfully side with Lou Dobbs on this particular issue: Americans can do it better.
Rather than simply waiting for a new terrorist attack, our military should carpet bomb a major American city to help put Republicans back in power. Of course, the patriotism Osama bin Laden inspired on September 11th only lasted so long, which is why our military should periodically attack its own citizenry, so that the dangers of Democratic rule are constantly in our minds.
While I would prefer that no Real American cities are destroyed, I know that the Democrats will insist on protecting the elitist, coastal cities that make up their base, so to make things fair I propose that every American city be entered into a lottery, similar to the one proposed in Shirley Jackson’s Utopian short story, to determine which city should be sacrificed to remind Americans that freedom isn’t free.
